I deserve to be loved.
I wish it could be J.
But maybe it can’t.
This is very hard to say. – But –
the times when –
for example the time
when he almost killed me (in his sleep) –
was he NOT “disturbed” generically but about ME?
Do I need THAT?
Ok. That’s as much as I can take of looking at that right now.
But a big point is that my energy is split – which I know isn’t the best but it is what it is.
So 1. I wish and want…
While 2. I deserve to be loved and wanted and cherished and if he won’t/can’t, someone will
and 3. I am fine now anyway.